July 29, 2020
Like goldfish, themselves, this trend may not be long-lived—but this summer, Goldfish Flops (AKA Fish Flops) are becoming the “new wave” in fashion.
The fish flops come in several colors, including hot pink, green, blue, and silver. (For those among us who cherish a matching set, you can also buy an adorable two-pack of face masks with a scale pattern on them!)
And it’s not just fish that Coddies offers for your feet. Other popular products, according to the site, include Bread Loafers, shoes in the shape of bananas, and slides designed to look like cut mangoes. Also: cabbage creepers!
And although virtually every garment has been subject to some novelty craze or another, shoes do seem to have become the nexus of a certain kind of deranged imagination. Looking back, the hottest craze among the elementary school set during the mid-’90s was Jellies—available in a rainbow of plasticized colors! Then in marched the light-up sneakers. Then Heelys skated onto the scene.
As Daily Beast writer Laura Bradley notes, “At a time when I have to constantly cover my face, I view the tacky, dead-eyed fish on my feet as a statement piece. I want to let others know that I, too, am losing my mind with bored, impotent desperation.”
“Still,” she says, “I can only hope that next time I see these neighbors, they’ll all be wearing Cabbage Creepers and Bread Loafers and Banana Splits. Because I have to say: $27.98 might sound steep for a pair of ugly, fish-shaped novelty shoes—but it’s already the most joy per dollar I’ve found in my life. And right now, that’s priceless.”
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